The Cameron Family

Going crazy on Facebook

2008-11-18T10:12:00.000-08:00

Ya'll can keep up with what I'm up to on Facebook too. Here's the link to my page and don't be shy! Send me a friend request!

First singles activity, first crush

2008-11-18T10:00:00.001-08:00

(from left to right: Janael, Lori, Scott, me, Wyatt, and Pam)

I met some new friends off of LDSMingle.com. We went up to Jumpoff Canyon for a hike. I've since gotten a hiking high. Love it! And then we followed it up with a crepe dinner at Scott's place.

Not the best picture. But this is Scott. He's a hottie, nuff said.

May 2008

2008-11-18T09:38:00.000-08:00

HYPNOBABIES INSTRUCTOR TRAINING

NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE

MAY 2ND-5TH

My roommates Liz and Karin.

You can't tell but in this picture I have a 102 degree temperature. I got strep so bad that when I got home I got to spend sometime in the hospital for a day getting loaded up on some super antibiotics. As much as I'm a "granola", I am thankful for modern medicine.
Where do birth junkies go whilst in Nashville? Not the Grand Ol' Opry! Never! We head to
The Farm!
The Farm is home to our fellow birth activist and midwife Ina May Gaskin who is a major pioneer in midwifery. This place is the closest I've witnessed to people living the Law of Consecration. Everyone works for one common goal, they all put in and every takes what they need. It's a very peaceful place, there is definitely a special spirit here. If it weren't for the ticks that we all took back to our hotel, I might consider spending a few more weeks here.

All of the homes and structures on The Farm are solar powered and very eco-friendly.

Most homes are made out of mud and clay. The local residents were so friendly and allowed us to come into their homes and photograph some very beautiful art.

Most homes and structures there had a live eco-system growing on the roof.

Lion.

From the outside.

The Straw Cabin is made entirely from clay and straw and stuff is uber strong!

The world's largest jungle gym. lol! This was meant to be a meeting house, only they didn't have the funding to complete it and it's just sort of there.

Yes, I AM ALIVE!!!

2008-11-18T09:12:00.000-08:00

A HUGE apology to all my faithful readers. Silly me thought I was invincible. Divorce kind of throws a bigger curve ball at you than ya planned. But I'm making my way back to life and doing the healing I need to do.

So without further ado, I'll be slowly updating this place. I have so much to tell ya'll!!! What I've been up since May, what the dating world is like, my new jobs, and my how my kiddies and the ex are doing. So sit tight and I'll get to it!

Still here

2008-05-13T16:35:00.000-07:00

Sorry, life has been crazy for me. I've been really sick, and just got done with my Hypnobabies Instructor training(saving for another post). Just trying to adjust and make this transition smoother for everyone. I think once school is out for the kids, I'll be back on here more. Just be patient!

My college roomies

2008-04-22T09:18:00.001-07:00

1998 - me, Colleen, and Trynda

2008 - Trynda pregnant with her 4th, me(single!), and Colleen pregnant with her 1st.

A few weekends back I got rare opportunity to go out with a few of my closest friends. Trynda and Colleen were my college roomies and we've stayed in touch ever since our crazy days at C.E.U. Us three live far apart now, so it is rare that we all find ourselves together on the same weekend.

We were partners in crime when we pranked the guys down the hall(everything from turning furniture upside down, to it being to moved down to the laundry room, and stealing their clothes and them stealing our bras and stringing them up in the hall for everyone to see), late nights singing "You Don't Own Me!"(from the movie The First Wives Club) at the top of our lungs into kitchen utensils after a breakup or just feeling erked by men in general, playing leap frog down the hall, my first taste of Starbucks icecream, walking in the nearby cemetary for peace and quiet, the boys belows us that would bang their broom on the ceiling because we were being too loud, annoying our other three, weird roommates, helping eachother through some very difficult times, me and Colleen getting stuck in a ditch with 2 hot guys whilst exploring the backwoods of Price, me and Trynda laughing til all hours of the night at the glowing stars on the ceiling(seriously, we must've been high on something because there's nothing funny about glowing stars on a ceiling. lol!).

We've seen eachother through boyfriends, breakups, engagements, weddings, babies, and now a divorce. I feel very blessed to have them as friends.

Hypnomom of the month

2008-04-22T09:10:00.000-07:00

About a month ago I was interview by Kerry Tuschhoff, the founder of Hypnobabies, for my entrance into the hypnosis intructor training program coming up next week. She liked me so much that she asked me to be on her live radio show to talk about my children's births. It was great fun, who doesn't love telling their child's birth story? Here's the link. Enjoy!

http://www.ecstreams.com/HealthyLife/wma/hyp0411_wma.asx

insert sad/witty title here

2008-04-06T21:02:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure exactly how you title the curve ball that life has given me. It could be "Single...again!" or "Back on the market" or "The big D word", whatever. If you couldn't already guess, my husband and have divorced. I just want to get it all out right now, so that I'm not explaining myself like I have been since it happened.

First off, I'm okay. Yes, this totally sucks. I'm loosing my best friend who I love dearly. I'm a whole lot of emotions right now, but I'm okay. Things are very amicable. Our oldest two are handling it well. I wish I could tell you more of the story. This will have to do for now. I would appreciate lots of prayers sent our way.

Lia Sophia party - pretty jewelry!

2008-03-31T18:38:00.000-07:00

I lied! I have one more thing to post about. I'm having a Lia Sophia party here at my place this Wednesday, April 2nd, at 7 p.m. My sisters have been big fans of this jewelry, and really it's beautiful! I'd love everyone to come that can. Don't be shy! There'll be lots of refreshments. My address is 1962 E. 6400 S. Murray.

Please be patient

2008-03-31T14:05:00.000-07:00

Life has thrown me a curve ball. I'll be back posting in a month or so. Wishing all of you the very best!

Busy!

2008-03-19T14:01:00.000-07:00

Yep, I'm busy as usual. Here's what I've been up and will be doing for the next week or so:

- Getting ready for the caucus that I'm hosting for the Constitution Party.
- Doula prenatals and consultations.
- Picking up and taking kiddies to school.
- Trying to manage my home, but being very unsuccessful.
- Trying to campaign, not really, but doing what I can.
- Mentoring meetings for doulas.
- Making more cinnamon rolls(hahahaha!) for the construction workers who are fixing our intersection - Jacob loves watching them!
- Going to the library.
- Getting ready for my trip to Nashville, TN in May to take my Hypnobabies Instructor Training.
- Visiting Teaching.
- Going crazy!

Well, that's all for now. I'll be back blogging in a week or so.

Kidney needed

2008-03-18T09:40:00.000-07:00

If you've got a spare kidney, this family could sure use it! Here's their story.

Changed my mind

2008-03-14T18:49:00.001-07:00

I decided to try something else. Now that I've figured out how to do this, it's pretty easy. So for those who saw the previous layout, did you like that one better or this one? The first one was a Winter Wonderland and this one is called Splendid. So which one? I can't decide.

Betcha didn't see this coming!

2008-03-13T18:43:00.001-07:00

I'm making my way to Capitol Hill. Yes, you heard me!

Everyone here knows how involved I've been with the midwifery legislation here in Utah. Well, I wanted to take a more active role. The initial plan was to become a delegate. As I became more involved in the process I met people, who I know I was supposed to meet. One thing that has been a passion to me has developed into something much bigger.

In the process I changed political parties too. I had always considered myself somewhat of a republican, but it seems lately that there is no difference between republicans and democrats. They're both one faction running on two different tickets. Neither of them coincide with my beliefs and morals. So last year at the Utah Homeschooling Convention I passed by the Constitution Party booth. I didn't think much of it at time, I signed up for their emails and went on my way. But as the Primary Elections started my mind returned to this party. I ran into a friend who was the legislative chairwoman for her district and she helped me find the right people. Everything has fallen into place.

The Constitution Party believes in our God given rights of free agency, defending the family unit, and restoring the republic. What what I find gratifying is that it's an educational party. They strongly believe in education and involving the public. There are weekly seminars in your neck of the woods, many people meet and learn about the constitution and how it should work for our country.

On Tuesday of this week I went down to the County Clerk's office, submitted my application, and was sworn in to run for State Reprentative of District 46 for the Constitution Party. My district covers south-east Murray, South Holladay and Cottonwood Heights.

I don't plan to actively campaign. My purpose is to help the Constitution Party receive more recognition. Hopefully, with my name on the ballot listed under this party, more people will wonder what they're all about and want to learn about it. As it is, I've four kiddies who need a mommy at home. Maybe in the next few years this is something that I will definitely aggressively pursue. In the event that hell freezes over and I am elected my main focus is to protect the birthing rights of Utah's women. Our healthcare should not be legislated by a third party or anyone!

Ta da!!!

2008-03-13T11:42:00.000-07:00

Okay, so it's not super fancy, but I'm satisfied. I'm not exactly sure how to add all the embellishments, I suppose that's where the Photoshop Elements comes in?Sheesh, it took forever to just find some time to do this. Now I need some time to put everything else back.

Under construction!

2008-03-08T15:36:00.000-08:00

I'll have this blog up and running a little better in a few days.

Experimenting

2008-03-06T13:04:00.001-08:00

Just changing things up here a little.

If anyone would like to customize a blog for me, I'll bake you a dozen cinnamon rolls. Seriously, I would! Me need help. Me html illiterate. Me like purple.

I can't stop myself!

2008-03-03T19:35:00.000-08:00

This is the third batch of cinnamon rolls I've made in just a few days. Soooo goooood!!!

So last year I bought a bread machine at a yard sale for $5. Josh had been wanting one for a while and $5 is a steal. Til now, it's sat untouched by me. Josh has made amazing breads in it. Basically I've been intimidated by this machine. The operation manual looked way too complicated and I don't like messing with things that look like a car manual.

Last week I got this HUGE craving for cinnamon rolls and I had this amazing recipe, so I tried it. Holy cow, it's not as hard as I thought it would be. And now I can stop making cinnamon rolls! Thank you to the Bread Man 2000 for satisfying my cinnamon roll craving!

Here's the recipe for anyone that wants to try.

Almost Cinnabon Cinnamon Rolls

4 T. butter, melted
4 T. water
1/2 box of vanilla instant pudding(the 3/4oz size)
1 C. milk
1 egg, beaten
1 T. sugar
1/2 t. salt
4 cups flour
2 1/2 t. active dry yeast

Filling:
1 C. brown sugar
2 t. cinnamon
1/2 C. butter, softened so it's easy to spread.

Place ingredients in bread machine in this order and set for dough cycle. When it's complete, remove and roll it out to a 17X10 rectangle. Spread softened butter. Combine cinnamon and sugar and sprinkle over spread butter. Roll dough tightly from long end, pinching ends closed when completely rolled. Slice with a pizza cutter, or dental floss(which ever works better) into 1 inch sections. Place onto greased baking pan and let it rise until double. Bake at 350 for 15-20 minutes. Frost immediately.

Frosting:
4 oz. cream chees, softened
1/4 C. butter, softened
1 1/2 C. powdered sugar
1/2 t. vanilla
1 1/2 t. milk

Enjoy!

Tagged!

2008-02-28T10:10:00.000-08:00

Thanks for the tag Joann!

A. The rules of the game are posted at the beginning.
B. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
C. At the end of the post, the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

10 Years Ago: Finishing up my first year at college. Enjoying the ups and downs of college life.

5 Things on my To-Do List today:

1- deposit my paycheck, chaching!!!
2- fold the heaping pile of clean laundry that just keeps getting bigger and bigger!
3- take a shower
4- get ready to go see The Business of Being Born - free screening at SLCC W. Jordan campus if anyone wants to come along!
5- take my kids to school, pick them up, get dinner ready, vacuum, take a shower(did I already say that?), put dishes away, load more dishes back in the washer, do more laundry, clean the windows that my son tried to clean with Spray 'n' Wash, play with my kids, make more cinnamon rolls......I could keep going, but I'm already exhausted.

Things I would do if I were a billionaire:

I'd buy us an awesome house, a maid, butler, take several vacations a year, pay off my parents mortgage, buy a house for my mother-in-law and sister-in-law's and everyone else in my family, watch my hubby relax and not have to worry about working, pursue my dreams of becoming a midwife and open a birthing center.

3 of my bad habits:

1- I always over extend myself, making commitments that I sometimes can't follow through on and then the people in my life end up feeling like they're not a priority.
2- Can you say "open mouth, insert foot"? I'm pretty socially inappropriate and don't always recognize when I've offended someone.
3- I spend way too much time on the internet.

5 places I have lived:

1- Coos Bay, Oregon where I was born.
2- West Valley, UT where I grew up.
3- Price, UT where I went to college.
4- Los Angeles, California where Josh and I lived for four years at his job.
5- Murray, UT where we live now.

5 jobs I have had:

1- Gymnastics coach, I taught the tiny tots. So fun!
2- TCBY - hated it!
3- Cruise America - tourists renting motorhomes, I was the rental manager. Stressful!
4- J.W. Pepper - the world's largest sheet music distributor. I really liked this job, got to work with some interesting people.
5- MOM - yep, I'm a mom!

5 things people don't know about me:

1- I can still do a backhandspring.
2- My favorite author is Orson Scott Card.
3- I absolutely hate talking on the phone, it's phobia for me and don't even think about asking me to talk to insurance companies or getting a babysitter. Email is way better.
4- I've never had stitches. Broken lots of bones, but never had stitches, knock on wood!
5- My favorite scented lotion is Cranberry from The Body Shop - it's their seasonal scent.

I tag Megan, Jessica, Darci, Mindy, and Tammy!!!

Adventures of an inventory auditor - embarrassing moment, sort of

2008-02-25T09:42:00.000-08:00

That's my part-time job. It's not a glamorous job, but it gives me a little extra spending money on the side. It's super laid back and really easy. And basically all I do is put a little laser on my finger and scan inventory. I've been doing it for a month now and I think it may be bad for my wallet. I haven't spent anything, but some of these stores always leaving wanting to go back. lol! Like last week and the week before I inventoried Justice and Limited Too - little girl clothes. Dangerous place for someone who has three daughters!

Anyway, last night my company inventoried Borders, by Fashion Place Mall. If you've been there you know that it's pretty big store. Occasionally as we scan, we'll come across an item that has no barcode and you need the assistance of the store manager. You get their attention by yelling,"SKU CHECK!". In a small store someone will easily hear you and come to help you. But if you're in Borders and you yell "sku check", either no one will hear you and if they do, they have no idea where you are. So with a large store you yell, "sku check" and the name of the section you're in, like,"sku check magazines!".

Well, that's really not a problem. However, if your manager puts you in adult erotica and gay/lesbian literature you've got a problem!!! So this was me,"SKU CHECK......silence.....erotica"(trying to say this in my most-discreet-don't-attract-any-attention-to-me-but legitimate-professional-adult-not-embarrassed tone of voice). I tried saying "romance", but then the store worker always ended up in the wrong section, not even close to where I was. Why not just put the smutty novels next to the smutty porn books?! Well, the store worker was just as red in the face as I was, he didn't quite know how to handle it. lol! Poor guy! And it always got every one's attention. To say the least, I was given a pretty hard time over it.

I really saw too much too. Feel like a need a shower or repentance. It would've been nice if some of these books just had solid covers. I'm just glad for it to be over.

Tonight's store is Express. Must. Resist. Temptation.

Midwifery Legislation update

2008-02-22T17:06:00.000-08:00

I know, I know, all this midwifery stuff is so exciting. Just thought I'd give ya'll a synopsis of what's been going on. I've been busy up the capitol all week, it's sort of exhausting but fun.

Midwives never wanted to be licensed by the state. They were being prosecuted and one midwife was told she had to choose between her LDS temple recommend or her midwifery practice (they were accused of practicing medicine without a license - a felony in Utah). She left her midwifery practice and pursued the bill to legalize midwifery in Utah. It would have been lovely to have stayed under the radar - had they not been threatened with jail time and loss of religious privileges.

Sen. Dayton's comments about not adhering to regulations is totally false. Midwives have a long and proven track record and were being monitored and have much better outcomes than physicians in Utah (this is true over the whole world actually). She and the UMedA are using scare tactics and false information (attributing deaths and other catastrophes to midwives - totally unfounded which you can see in DOPL's stats).

The bill affects ALL midwives - licensed and unlicensed. They already have rules and regulations in place and DOPL (dept of occupational and professional licensing) is keeping track of the midwives and maintaining statistics and outcomes and they are excellent.

The biggest problem with the bill being passed out of the senate was that the senators were under the mistaken impression that this was a"compromise" bill between the Utah Medical Association (which is the group behind the bill) and the LDEM's (licensed direct entry midwives).

At the Senate committee meeting the UMedA was admonished to stop wasting everyone's time and work something out with the midwives.They met and after a number of hours they agreed on many points. The UMedA told them they would draft the bill and have the LDEM's review it before they submitted it to the Senate. Instead they wrote their own new bill that effectively risks out at least 96% of all clients. They snuck the bill into the Senate without notifying the midwives.

This bill removes parents rights that have been guaranteed elsewhere in statute. If this bill passes it will mean that a group of surgeons that don't understand normal or natural birth have forced women into medically managed hospitals - many of them forced into surgery.

The group Utah Friends of Midwives has more information about this and you can join their email group:

http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/UtahfriendsofMidwives/

My fun sleepover

2008-02-17T19:07:00.001-08:00

Megan is my best friend. I'm still amazed that even over the years and with the distance that we've still been able to keep a friendship going. We became friends back in our ol' elementary school days. We had tons of sleepovers and did gymnastics together. She was my bridesmaid and a huge help on my wedding day(her mom helped out too!) when Josh and I got stranded at the temple - funny story. We've both done cheerleading and drill team, just at different schools. She's like a sister to me.

Well, I got the weekend off and headed up to Hyrum and spent the night. I haven't had a sleepover in ages! It was a total blast. We shopped, ate out, and watched Pride and Prejudice, what Josh calls a "tea and crumpet" movie. lol! And I got to sleep in, hallelujah! Her children are absolutely adorable! And a huge thankyou to her hubby Aaron for watching the kids while we went out, even though he was totally tired from his scout outting.

Thankyou Megan for a fun weekend. And I'm totally getting my passport now, you'd better be too!

Parks and Maddy, too cute!

Megan and Aaron. What a cute couple!

Snowy roads = poo!

2008-02-17T19:05:00.000-08:00

This is the only way to describe our drive home after our Discovery Gateway visit. Roads were awful all over and I think we were just greatful to get home safely.

Discovery Gateway

2008-02-17T18:53:00.000-08:00

The kids had a blast at the Discovery Gateway Children's Museum last week. They had a new Sesame Street Body exhibit. So the kids got to go through and learn about the body. I love this place because the kids can just let their imaginations go wild.

Jacob showing off his construction get-up

Miri learning about the different parts of the foot.

Autumn shopping at the gift center.

Alisha and Miri doing their pretend shopping.

Learning more about the body at the Sesame Street Body Station.

Valentine's Day crafts

2008-02-12T19:52:00.000-08:00

A huge THANKYOU to Joann who posted this idea on her blog. It was so much fun for my kiddies and surprisingly easy. We sifted through our crayon bucket and found all the small broken pieces. Jacob especially had fun breaking the pieces that were too long. We found a silicon heart mold tray at Target for $10. And here's what we came up with.

GNO

2008-02-10T08:54:00.000-08:00

Michelle, Erin, me, and Heidi

Last night I got together with some old friends from high school. It was so much fun to get out with the girls. We talked about birth stories, our kiddies, high school memories, stuff that we're into these days, TV shows....I think we could've kept going all night! lol! So for those Granger alum's that read my blog, you missed out! Hope you can join us next month!

Health Committee heard our case today

2008-02-07T19:42:00.000-08:00

Basically what this bill is, is a turf war. The Utah Medical Association does not like us taking our money somewhere else.

It was a total riot listening to Sen. McCoy(who supports us) ask the president of the UMA some really important questions that she didn't have any answers to, and she couldn't site her sources for the "horror" birth stories we were hearing. She basically could give no good reason why this issue is being brought up again. The thing that bugs the UMA is that we have numbers and statistics that favor us. Our numbers reflect that not one baby has died under the care of midwife, then the UMA president went on to admit that there's atleast one infant death per week at St. Marks(nothing against St. Marks, they're a very "birth naturally" friendly hospital). Duh! Not such a smart thing to say to the committee.

The whole committee was totally bugged that this issue is still on the table. The Utah Midwives Association is supposed to meet with the UMA over this bill and make some more compromises. If they don't find a way to compromise with us they'll be loosing their credibility with this bill.

Unfortunately, the bill passed out of committee and is now headed to the senate floor. So I'll be going back up to the capitol with my fellow homebirthers and midwives to talk more to our reps. And we'll let the UMA keep digging themselves a very large hole.

Check out the Reunion Blog!

2008-02-02T14:54:00.001-08:00

There's a new announcement. We've organized a Lady Lancers Night Out. Hope you'll join us!

Come show your support(and read below as well).

2008-02-01T16:13:00.000-08:00

SB 93 has been assigned a committee!!! If you'd like to show your state reps that your DO NOT approve of this bill please join us moms at the State Capitol this coming Tuesday.

We will be meeting in Room W020, West Office Building, Utah State Capitol Complex at 8:00 a.m. Look for PINK stickers that say "NO on SB93!"

We need lots of moms and babies. Lots of babies! The more women we have who oppose this bill the more this senate committee will take us seriously. We can kill this bill right now with lots of support. If it's killed now it'll never make it to the senate floor and that's what we want.

Please come show your support!

Utah's midwives NEED your help!

2008-02-01T15:30:00.000-08:00

EVERYONE, I need your help! Many of you know that I'm very passionate about childbirth. Well I'm also very passionate about who a woman's right to choose her care provider. For some of you, you feel comfortable with an OB/GYN or maybe a CNM. For me, I choose a LDEM(Licensed Direct-entry Midwife). This issue has come up because State Sen. Margaret Dayton hates Utah midwives. She would like to get rid of us, and I count me in this too because someday I would like to become a midwife. Senator Dayton has introduced a bill that would limit who a woman chooses as her care provider. Sen. Dayton has been quoted in the newspapers saying that,"women should have the choice of laboring with a high end obstetrician or laboring alone at home in a dark bathroom". Those are her exact words. She's not a nice lady.

Two years ago Utah midwives fought hard for a bill that would allow them to practice legally and gain licensure. Licensure would allow them to practice with medicine. Meaning that for us women who choose to birth at home, our midwife is able to work with medicine such as antibiotics(for Group B Strep), or administer pitocin in cases where the mom is hemmorhaging(never to induce).

Senator Dayton has introduced a bill that would not allow me to birth at home. In this bill she attempts to define what "normal" birth is. The thing is, women come in all shapes and sizes, you can't put a label like "normal" on us. Because of this bill I would be risked out and my midwife would not be allowed to take me on as a patient. My midwife provides me the EXACT same care that you would find in your OB's office. She does regular blood screening, urine tests, doppler for heart tones, and can even refer your for ultra sounds. What I love best about my midwife is that she absolutely cares for all of her patients. It's been comforting to know during my pregnancies that if I had any cares or concerns that she would take the time to listen and thoroughly address everything. And I've had OB's that just dismissed me or would not respect my wishes.

I know that most of you would not even consider birthing at home, but this does affect you too. Perhaps your choosing to birth with a midwife in the hospita(CNM - Certified Nurse Midwife), under this bill your own CNM would not be able to take you on as a patient. Wouldn't it be sad to not be able to choose a medical professional you trust? I risk out out of midwifery care because I am Rh-, GBS positive, I have hypothyroidism, a history of babies over 9 lbs(one the more ridiculous reasons, in my opinion), a family history of hypertension(although I don't have it), a history of miscarriage before 12 weeks, and because I refuse all the other "optional" tests offered in a dr's office. Isn't it amazing that with all that's wrong with me, that I can still give birth at home to a healthy baby? This bill defines a "normal" birthing woman as someone who is about to give birth for the first time, has NO history of any genetic or other diseases, and has been impeccably healthy their whole life. I do not know of a single woman that would come close to this definition.

Not only does this bill limit your choice, it would risk-out over 90% of Utah midwives clientele. Clearly this is a restraint of trade. I'd also like to point out that the statistics and numbers for Utah midwives for the 2006-07 year were excellent. Even the WHO and Utah's own health department have been quoted saying that homebirths had FAR LESS complications than births that occured in the hospital.

Again, I know that most of you would not choose a homebirth for you, but I would hope that you value your agency in choosing your care provider. I'm asking you to please write to your State Senator and House Representative. As a constituent, your voice needs to be heard, your Rep needs to know that you do not approve of this bill. PLEASE JOIN ME IN WRITING A LETTER. Find out who your reps are and send them an email.

Here is a link for finding out who your State Rep is: http://le.utah.gov/house/DistrictInfo/newMaps/State.htm

And for your State Sen.:http://se15.utahsenate.org/perl/spage/distmapal.pl

Here is Senate Bill 93 (SB93): http://le.utah.gov/~2008/bills/sbillint/sb0093.htm

If you would like to write to your rep, but aren't sure what to say in your letter send me an email and I'll put together a message for you.

THANKYOU!!!!

Tagged!

2008-01-30T10:28:00.000-08:00

I've been tagged by Heidi!

Here goes:

1. Best thing you cooked last week?
We found this recipe in our pH Miracle cookbook and it's our favorite. It's called Zippy Breakfast and it's basically chopped avocadoes, tomatoes, bellpepper, Udo's oil and Liquid Aminos over hot rice. It's so freakin' good!

2. If money, time and babysitting were no object, where would you go and with who?
I'd take my hubby and go on a cruise somewhere in the Caribbean.

3. When was the last time you cried?
Last week. I try to avoid at all costs the country song,"I Loved Her First". Whenever I hear it, I just start blubbering.

4. Five things you were doing 10 years ago:
1- Cheering for C.E.U. Go Eagles!!!
2- Waitin' and datin' on my guy - he didn't know how smitten I was with him, so he didn't know I was waiting.
3- Getting engaged to another guy when "my" guy came home off his mission - LONG story!
4- Having a major prank war with the guys down the hall. Good stories there!
5- Just trying to get through my first year of college.

5. Five things you were doing 5 years ago:
1- Being a mom to my two oldest.
2- In the primary presidency.
3- Living in Los Angeles.
4- Hosting A LOT of baby showers. We had 10 babies born in one year, that's a record for the Canoga Park ward.
5- Going back to school as Los Angeles Pierce College.

6. Five things you were doing 1 year ago:
1- Had a wonderful homebirth with Autumn.
2- Elected as the new president of Utah Friends of Midwives Association. Spending lots of time up on Capitol Hill talking to senators and reps.
3- Started my doula work.
4- Found my passion in childbirth and hope someday to be a Licensed Direct-entry Midwife.
5- Busy being a mom and chauffering them all over.

7. Seven of your favorite hobbies:
1- Blogging, which I never thought I'd be interested in.
2- Reading, self-help or new-age books mainly.
3- Researching anything about alternative medicine, learning about herbs.
4- Attending births, obviously.
5- Making desserts. I don't know why this is so soothing to me, but there is just something about digging into something sweet that you've made all by yourself.
6- Learning about autism.
7- Traveling.

8. Five favorite foods:
1- Sweet 'n' sour chicken
2- Chicken parmisan
3- smoked beans and sausage
4- Lettuce wraps from Pei Wei
5- Ham fried rice with sweet n sour sauce drizzled over it.

9. Five places you've been:
This should be five places you'd like to go to because I haven't been anywhere exciting.
1- Nauvoo
2- New Hampshire, Boston
3- Oregon
4- California
5- Washington

10. Five Favorite Memories:
1- My wedding day.
2- The births of all four of my children.
3- Dressing the guys up in our brasiers for a talent show in college, way funny.
4- The day I won the state championship in gymnastics.
5- Toilet papering my ex-boyfriends house. Sweet revenge!

People I'm tagging:
Tisha Hunt and Sara Farrer, because I don't think they've been tagged yet. Connie Pender because I haven't heard from her for forever. Scott Pearson, because he's too busy to update his blog. haha! Bobbie Newton because even though I read their family blog I don't know very much about her.

Okay taggies, copy and paste and put your own answers in, then tag five other people.

Happy Day

2008-01-29T09:30:00.000-08:00

Josh, Miri, and cousin Amaya

Well, atleast I think it should be celebrated. My sweet hubby, who works so hard for our family, got a new promotion and raise at work!!! I know he's felt really conflicted about staying in the IT industry, but this new promotion is a change. It's an opportunity to learn more and make his resume look really snazzy. I'm excited for him. He actually had a spring in his step this morning. I love you honey!!!

President Hinckley 1910-2008

2008-01-27T20:30:00.000-08:00

I am happy to know that our beloved President Hinckley is with his loving wife Marjorie. I am also saddened by his departure. He will be missed.

My baby is sick

2008-01-27T18:41:00.000-08:00

A few days ago Autumn got what I thought was just the beginning of a cold. Coughing, runny nose, congestion, no big deal right? Friday night a fever accompanied the symptoms. On Saturday she could hardly breathe. I thought she had classic RSV symptoms from what I was reading on the internet. The one precaution to lookout for was blue coloring in the lips and extremities. So after her nap on Saturday I found her struggling to breathe and her lips turning blue. We rushed her over to the Urgent Care center nearby and had them do an Nebulizer treatment, which helped a ton. The doctor came in and listened to her chest. Not good. She got x-rays next. She didn't have RSV, she has pneumonia. So we have nebulizer home with us and she's breathing in Albuterol. And I hope feeling much better, at least she sounds better. Poor baby! It scared me out of my mind to see her struggling to breathe like that. While I'm a very "crunchy" momma, I am thankful for modern medical technology. I can't imagine how I would treat pneumonia with out it.

Memories

2008-01-25T21:17:00.001-08:00

Heidi's blog entry about her daughter and makeup had me reminiscing about the time Jacob and Alisha got into their Aunt Jennie's makeup. Jacob was 5, Alisha 4. Half of me was thinking,"Quick hun, where's the camera?", the other half that was not so happy was thinking,"Holyfreakingbleepbleepbleepeyetwitchingbleep!!!". So yeah, it took weeks for it to come off because most of it was semi-permanent. Oh joy!

Notice that the makeup is not just on them, but on the bathroom mirror, floor, wall, bathtub, EVERYWHERE! And I think it's still there to this day. That semi-permanent makeup is definitely a formidable opponent when it comes to your heavy duty household cleaning chemicals.

And yes, Alisha is crying and Jacob just doesn't know what to do because both of them know they're in trouble! And they definitely know that mommy's makeup bag is off limits. Now if I could just make my point with Miri....I can wish can't I?

Girls Night Out

2008-01-23T20:12:00.001-08:00

I seriously need a GNO. I can't do anything this weekend, but next weekend is totally open. Just throwing this out there incase there are any takers here. Anyone want to join me for a movie and food?

I'm hiding in my bedroom...

2008-01-22T16:32:00.000-08:00

for like 10 minutes. The "witching hour" has begun at my house. I need a sanity break. I really wish my hubby didn't have crazy hours cause I'm done being mommy at like 4:00. Seriously, what do you do for your kids when all you feel like doing is shipping them to Mexico?

Spammers

2008-01-19T13:10:00.001-08:00

Do they ever take a break?! I'm gonna have to shut down my yahoo address, I get atleast 25 of these ads in my inbox everyday. The porno, sexy singles invites, and viagra ads have got to stop! And I'm tired of inheriting millions of dollars from long lost loved ones in Africa! Venting done.

Seriously.

2008-01-12T22:29:00.000-08:00

This is the one show I didn't want to become addicted to. And now I can't get enough of McDreamy and must catch up on past episodes...Darn that writer's strike!

What does it mean to be a child of God?

2008-01-06T18:11:00.000-08:00

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so
that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other
people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others."

^^ Authored and published by Marianne Williamson ^^

I think this is what is means to be a child of God. My friend Tisha posted this quote on her blog. It has touched me deeply and I'm still pondering on these words. I wonder how it would be if more people knew who they were. But it's not simply to know who you are, but to feel who you are. Not that you are better or more worthy than another, but to feel that worth, that love inside yourself. Maybe that small part of the Great Plan of Happiness is to find that love and happiness inside of ourselves. And when we love ourselves, then we can let that light shine.

Strummin' on the ol' banjo!

2008-01-03T12:49:00.000-08:00

Well, not a banjo, but woohoo I'm taking guitar lessons! I just signed up and ordered my acoustic guitar online. I wanted to do something different this year and since we don't have the space(or in my case the patience) for a piano, I opted for a guitar. I'm so freaking excited!

And, and, and!...I also applied for a job. I've already got all the logistics figured out. It's been years since I worked outside my home. Apparently the doula business hits a huge lull in the winter time. I need something to keep me busy. lol! Feeling excited today!

Shameless plug

2008-01-02T10:09:00.000-08:00

Are you or someone you know pregnant? Would they be interested in hearing how they can have a wonderful birth experience? Would they be interested in talking to a birthing doula? If you've answered yes to all three, please come see me!

I'm currently taking new clients. I do free consultations. I'll help you envision the birth you've always wanted by writing up a birth plan, attending prenatals with you, educating you on your choices in whatever setting you've planned on(hospital, birth center, home, etc), and helping you feel like an active participant, in control of your baby's birth no matter the birth you choose(epidural, C-section, or unmedicated).

I travel within the following counties: Salt Lake, Utah, Davis, Tooele, and Summit.

I can take emails at kameo1010@yahoo.com or call me at 801-830-8872 to schedule your free consultation.

Foosball

2007-12-29T10:19:00.001-08:00

I'm thinking of investing in one of these tables. Just so my 7-year-old son won't beat me in a game, and for so many more reasons. lol! That is all.

Merry Christmas!!!

2007-12-24T23:10:00.000-08:00

Get Funny Pictures at pYzam.com

Chocolate and oreos...

2007-12-20T12:47:00.000-08:00

is what my home smells like right now. I've been elbow deep in melted chocolate and crushed oreos. I've been making Oreo Truffles as Christmas treats for our neighbors. I found this recipe in my Kraft food magazine last year. These truffles are seriously so freaking good and easy! BEWARE: if you try one, these delicious morsels may never make it to their intended destination.

Oreo Truffles

1 package Oreos
1 8 oz cream cheese
1 bag chocolate chips

1) In a food processor, crush oreos into fine crumbs.
2) Mix cream cheese in with oreo crumbs, blend thoroughly. Helps if cream cheese is room temp.
3) Form oreo mixture into 1 inch balls, place on plate and put into freezer for 1 hour. The firmer they are the easier they are to handle in the melted chocolate.
4) Melt chocolate chips and coat oreo balls. Place on a lined cookie sheet and place back in the freezer for the chocolate to harden.

This recipe is versatile too. You can experiment with different flavored oreos and flavored chips. I made this last year and did mint oreos and mint chips, peanut butter oreos with peanut butter chips. I also tried raspberry flavored chips and did a regular oreo center. It was very yummy! You can also double coat the truffle in the left over melted chocolate. You can get decorative with them too, for example, do a coating of brown chocolate and then drizzle white chocolate over. Whatever you do, people will be impressed. It looks like it took a lot of time, but it's really doesn't and it's sooo easy.

Helpful hint: drizzle a 1/2 tsp of olive oil into your melted chocolate so that it doesn't become chalky.

Enjoy!

Happy Birthday Alisha!

2007-12-12T12:29:00.000-08:00

Yes, we have two December birthdays in our family. Alisha's original "guess date" was on Josh's birthday. But she decided she wanted her own day. Alisha is a happy little girl who loves My Little Pony's, putting on imaginary makeup(and mommy's when she not getting caught), loves dancing, and is just a little people pleaser(which worries me sometimes). I wrote a little more about Alisha down below.

Preparing for Alisha's birth exciting for me. Jacob was only 6-months-old when we learned we were going to have another baby. So I was fighting a lot of conflicting emotions, but after Jacob's birth I knew I wanted to have a better birthing experience. I needed to. I researched a lot of different birthing methods, but the one that caught my eye was Hypnobirthing. I ended up doing a lot to get ready. I practiced my scripts faithfully and started reading up on my rights in the hospital. I coupled the Hypnobirthing with the Bradley method, because their birthing philosophy's, while a little different, were pretty much the same. The Bradley method helped Josh prepare to be my doula. I was confident that her birth would be a good one.

So her guess date came and went and I thought she'd never get here. lol! Josh's sister Theresa came out to spend time with us and add some extra help when the new baby arrived. So we were ready, just needed a baby.

At 4 p.m. on December 11th I noticed that I was having some regular birthing waves. What impressed me is that they weren't painful like they were with Jacob's birth. I dismissed them as Braxton-Hicks and went on with my day(which is a very common thing for hypno-moms to do, most don't even know they're in labor). Around 8 p.m. they were becoming more intense and closer together. I clued in and called Josh to have him come home from work(he had crazy work days), that is was "baby time". We hung around the house for a couple of hours packing bags and doubting whether or not we should go. Because don't most birth education classes tell you to come to the hospital when the birthing waves are 3-5 minutes apart? They became three minutes apart so we went. I still wasn't in any pain, just strong pressure sensations.

So, we get to the hospital around 11 p.m. I'm still in no pain. Into triage, no pain. The nurse checks me, I think I'm probably around 3 cm's. The nurse freaks out,"Holy cow, you're 7 cm's!". All hell(yes, I said hell!) breaks loose. Nurses start yelling at me and my husband about how it was irresponsible that we waited so long to come in. Everyone is rushing to get set up. By now I'm scared(no woman in labor should be yelled at) and yes, now I'm in pain. The classic fear-tension-pain syndrome was kicking in. 30 minutes after my arrival my water broke on it own. Hello! The flood gates hath opened! Nurses are running me down the hall in the gurney I'm on. They start asking me if I want an epidural, while another nurse is trying to start an IV. It was crazy. My dr showed up and ask if I wanted an epidural. Good grief, I had a birth plan, my dr had one, as well as the nurses. Did they not read the big bold print that said, "PLEASE DO NOT OFFER ME AN EPIDURAL!" Gah! 30 minutes later I'm getting a huge urge to push, and I dr's telling me not to. Hahaha! Guess what? I'm pushing and there's not a damn thing you can do about it! lol! I pushed for a good five minutes and I birthed my beautiful 7 lbs. 5 oz. 19 in. baby girl.

I was totally euphoric after her birth. I felt so great that I was able to walk myself to my post-partem recovery room, much to the dismay of the nurses. I went home sometime the next day. I just felt so good. Looking back, I realized that my labor with her was painless until I got to the hospital. When I became pregnant again with Miri, I knew that if I was in my comfortable familiar surroundings I would feel safe. And for me, feeling safe means painfree.

Funny story, while I was pregnant with her we picked out her name. We had planned on naming her Angela, after Josh's older sister who passed away during birth. But sometime later Josh dreamt of a little girl who came to him and told him her name was Alisha. He wrote the dream down and we stuck it on our list. WELL, as soon as they laid this beautiful girl on my tummy, we saw that this was not Angela. Alisha was her and she'd named herself. It took us about a month to kick the habit of calling her Angela. lol!

Happy birthday baby girl! I love you dearly. I love your silly little laugh, the way you roll your eyes when you think mom is being ridiculous, your love of reading, and the way you sense what other people are feeling. I love that you are completely open to loving other people unconditionally and are always so forgiving. You are truly a precious gift to our family.

Happy Birthday Josh!!!

2007-12-10T18:14:00.000-08:00

It's my sweet hubby's birthday today. We went out to eat at the Cheesecake Factory and had some yummy avocado eggrolls. Seriously, those things are sooo good! We made our meal complete by polishing it off with the best cheesecake in the world. We did some birthday shopping and ended our evening together.

I know everyone says this about their own husband, but I think my guy is truly a rare find. Josh is very different from other men and that is why I adore him. He is the most patient person I've ever met, and patience is something you need a lot of with me. He is so unselfish. Last week when he was having a bad day, instead of venting to me or throwing a pity party he took time to counsel me on my problems. He really does lead our family as a righteous priesthood holder.

Josh, I will forever be greatful that you married me. My testimony of Heavenly Father only grows when I think how he let this wonderful man into my life. He has blessed me greatly! Happy Birthday honey!

My Crystal children - feeling blessed to be a mom

2007-12-06T10:37:00.000-08:00

Well, I've changed my mind on keeping my children's name's a secret. I'd like to introduce them to everyone. I know I risk weirding everyone out, but keeping this in wouldn't be doing any favors. This is weird part of me, is mostly who I am. Yes, I'm weird, but you probably already knew that. lol!

The word Crystal children refers to the children that our coming to earth now to help usher in the Last Days. The more and more I read about these children, I can see them everywhere. Their large piercing eyes, the gifts they come with, the knowledge they can teach us, if we let them. They veil is thin for them, they have the ability to communicate in ways that are strange to us.

Jacob is my oldest. He is a bubbly boy. He currently loves, loves, loves Transformer toys. Jacob is very mechanical with hands. He can take things apart and knows exactly how to put them back together in the correct order. He's also high-functioning autistic. Most Crystal children are categorized into the group. What some parents don't realize is how blessed they are to have this child in there family. In my heart I knew when Jacob was staring off into space, I just knew that he was seeing things beyond the veil. Probably talking with angels. Last month Jacob told me about our wedding day, that he had been in attendance. I've no doubt about that, our intuitive temple sealer announced that our children were in attendance. Now Jacob has only ever seen my bridal picture, he described as very big, fluffy and bouncy. He's seen my husband in his black tux. But what he described to me totally left my jaw on the floor. He told me that my dress was very plain and small, I had been married in my temple dress. He also described our ceremonial clothes to a "T" and that his dad was all in white too. Wow!

Alisha is our next oldest. Alisha has the ability to sense what other people are emotionally feeling. She can also sense when something is wrong with someone in the family, who may not be present or physically next to her. She can read people, and she's super trusting which can be scary at times. Alisha was also my best friend in the pre-earth life. One morning as I was nursing her, she was about a month old, Heavenly Father granted me one precious moment to know and feel that the child I was nursing had been my companion in heaven. I saw for a moment two grown women in their prime walking hand in hand, and I could see me and I just knew that the other girl was Alisha. So yes, we have a very special bond.

Mirianna is our third. She is little miss spunky to boot! Miri is two right now. She is a independent self-learner, she just potty trained herself a few weeks ago and didn't want any help. She celebrates all her little accomplishments, like washing her hair by giving herself a swirly in the toilet. lol! She talks to imaginary people in her room, which I'm assuming are angels. They must be protecting her because she's a little dare-devil. I now know what my mom must've felt like when she first saw me flip off the couch. She has absolutely no fear!

Autumn is our fourth and last child. My pregnancy was very spiritual with her. I knew the moment I conceived her. My vibrations were so high that I could feel her spirit next to me just waiting for her turn on earth. She came to me a few times to tell me of her mission here on earth, the she would need help. She's vibrates to high sometimes that our electrical appliances won't work if she's in the room. lol! And most of the time she can't handle it, she'll start crying and pull at her hair. We've learned this cue with the TV. And now we are a TV free family. She's much happier. We just don't let her sit around the computer. She, Alisha, and Miri also have their own language. All Autumn has to do is say something in her baby language and Miri, who can talk quite well or Alisha, lets me know what and problem solved. It's just amazing.

So these are my children. I feely greatly blessed to be entrusted with such special spirits. They do bring happiness to me and I have a loving husband who is teaching me how to cherish their cute moments. I know most days are overwhelming, but the cute moments make up for it. I love hearing,"Mommy, I love you!". There's nothing sweeter than hearing the word "mommy".

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!!!

2007-12-01T10:51:00.000-08:00

I'm in heaven! I don't know what it is about the winter time. But when those stormy skies appear, the snow starts falling, and you start wearing your warmer clothes, I just feel so at home. I know some people get Seasonal disorders when the winter comes, I'm the opposite, I get it in the summer. Too much sunshine.

Well, now I'll start listening to Christmas music, it feels more appropriate. Time to get out the snow tubes and really enjoy mother nature.

I wish mom's could collect sick days

2007-11-25T20:25:00.001-08:00

Seriously, why can't mom's have sick days? I remember when we lived in L.A. that Josh got two weeks off for paternity leave when JA and AL were born. That would be so cool if there were some way that husbands got two weeks of sick days to use when their wives get sick. I sure could use it tomorrow. This head cold is sure a doozy and my whole body aches. Anyone wanna come take care of me? lol!

It's finally off!

2007-11-19T21:34:00.001-08:00

JA got his cast off and pins taken out today! Hallelujah! Everything went very smoothly. The nurse taking off his cast was so good with him, distracting him by talking, whilst taking the pins out. The comical moment came when the nurse asked him if he had any pets. Jacob let out a big sigh and said,"No we can't have any pets, mom says she aleady has 4". ROFLMBO!!! He had the nurse and his dr in stitches from laughing. Ah, I love that boy!

Awesome birth!

2007-11-14T21:03:00.000-08:00

Where do I start? I love homebirths! I love Hypnobabies! I love being a doula!

Yesterday I had the honor of attending an awesome homebirth. And awesome is the perfect word because I'm just in awe of this woman. Tisha, who was my doula for AM's birth, had her baby and I had the honor of attending. Wow, what a woman! Tisha is amazing!

I'm doing a little bit of a flashback here. I remember the birth story of Tisha's second baby born at home. I remember her writing about how she felt like she lost control and had a wonderful midwifery assistant(Bridgette) telling her that a laboring mother was a woman in her majesty. (Sorry if I got that wrong Tisha!) What powerful words. Those same words were told back to me during AM's birth and have stuck with me ever since.

Well, baby #3's birth was the most beautiful, calmest thing I've ever seen. I arrived at Tisha's home around 2:30 to find her so very focused doing her hypnosis. Her husband, Sam was so playful with her between birthing waves and we all ended up laughing quite a bit(getting those good endorphins going). We didn't do much moving around, she mostly wanted to lie down, moving a few times for bathroom breaks and ralaxing on the birthing ball. I few times I coached her into hypnosis by reminding her to turn her "lightswitch" off. She was excellent at communicating her needs. Around 5 o'clock we started doing counter-pressure and called her midwife shortly after.

While we were waiting for her midwife, Suzanne, to show up Tisha had us prep her for disappointing news. She was afraid that Suzanne would get there and find her only at 4 cm's. So we made 4 a good number, it was her favorite number, and just reminded her that she had the strength to take as long as was needed because she was conserving her energy so well by relaxing. I thought for sure she was atleast 7 cm's by the sounds she was making, soft, low moaning through each birthing wave. Suzanne showed up a little before 6:30 p.m. and checked her and found her to be completely 10 cms!!! Bag of waters still intact and ready to have her sweet baby girl any minute. I was in total disbelief, because this did not sound or look like a woman at 10 cm's. Tisha was calm, composed, and relaxed. Keep in mind Tisha was in disbelief from the time I showed up to the time her baby was born. lol!

About a half hour later her water finally broke on it own. She moved onto the birthing stool to help move baby down a bit. Sam sat behind her on the bed to support her, it was so sweet watching him caress her face and give her encouragement. I love those little moments during birth when husband and wife are making a connection. I don't know if men know that us women need that during birth, atleast I did and for me it helped knowing that Josh was staying by my side, that was the connection I needed.

Pushing seemed a bit difficult for her because Tisha never gets the urge to bear down. And who wants to willingly push? At one point Suzanne looked at her and said,"Now's the time you need to dig down deep inside you and find that strength". I thought those were neat words. And that she did, she found that strength, she needed to because baby's heart tones were not sounding good and she needed to birth her baby quick. About then Tisha enveloped me in a full-on bear hug/choke hold. lol! Birthing women are sooo strong, don't mess with us! Once baby's head was birthed, Suzanne found a cord wrapped around the neck. Baby was still okay and with the next push baby was out and in mommy's arms. At 7:32 p.m. a beautiful 7 lbs. 5 oz. baby girl made her arrival. Now I've seen a lot of homebirth baby's not cry because they adjust so well, but I've never seen one open her eyes immediately. This little girl was eager to see what was going on. It was absolutely precious.

Tisha had a few firsts with this birth. It was the first time she didn't throw-up, she did get nauseous, but didn't throw-up. This baby girl came 5 days early, when her first two came atleast 7 days late. It was her mother's birthday, what a great present! And it was the first birth she didn't loose control. It truly was an honor to be my doula's doula. Thankyou Tisha!!! And I hope you and that little girl are getting lots of rest, I'll being seeing you soon.

The little joys

2007-11-13T09:13:00.000-08:00

My little joy was yesterday when I was cooking. My friend Sunny submitted a recipe to the MOF Recipe Book for Bulgulgi, which is Korean BBQ. It is seriously so freaking good and EASY! You serve it with rice and soy sauce and wrap it up in a lettuce leaf. Anyway, I overlooked one of the ingredients, which was Sesame oil. I knew that a few months back I had bought some, but in our move a lot of our groceries got moved around and I just forgot where I put things. As I was shutting the pantry door I notice a little white lid, lo and behold there was the Sesame oil I needed. I've never been so happy about making dinner! I think I did a little dance or not. I'm not a good cook because usually I'm missing atleast one or two of the ingredients. Even though I've made a thorough grocery list, I always seem to overlook those one or two ingredients I need. Then I end up improvising and the meal ends up kind of on the yucky side. But yesterday I had ALL ingredients and it was sooo good. Tonight is Veggie Lasagna, I'm crossing my fingers it turns out okay.

Bulgulgi (Korean BBQ meat)
1/2 T. sesame seeds
2 cloves of garlic, minced
1/4 t. black pepper
3 T. sugar
2 T. soy sauce
1/4 C. green onions, sliced very thin
1/4 t. salt
2-3 T. water
1 T. sesame oil
1 lb. tender beef, cut in very thin slices (you can usually find this beef already packaged and sliced very thin in the meat dept, if not just ask for it to sliced thin)

1. In a dry skillet, parch sesame seeds until slightly brown. Grind or mash.
2. Combine all ingredients, except beef.
3. Once mixed pour into a Ziploc bag, add beef and let it marinate for atleast 2 hours.
4. Cook in a frying pan with a bit of oil.

For a dipping sauce, mix 3/4 part soy sauce with 2/3 part water. Serve meat with sides of large leaf lettuce, rice, and dipping sauce. To eat authentically, spoon rice, meat, and dipping sauce into your lettuce wrap. Enjoy!

Yucky kid food

2007-11-08T19:16:00.000-08:00

When I was younger my mom would try to make me eat hotdogs and bolognie. These are two kid foods that totally make me want to ralph. What is it with bolognie and hotdogs? Even the thought of them makes me nauseous. My kids love these two foods, and I make sure that they eat it as far away from me as possible. Yeah, my daughter just walked past me with a slice of bolognie, so that's what's on my mind. Yuck!

Christmas music already?

2007-11-07T20:14:00.000-08:00

Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas. I love the story, the symbolism, the family get-togethers, the snow(yes I do!!!), and cozying up with my hubby. But come on! Just let us get through Thanksgiving first! Atleast two of my regular radio stations are already playing Christmas/Holiday tunes. It's just so irritating. So I'm boycotting my radio stations until December 1st. One can only handle so much "Dashing Through The Snow". Snow, what snow?! Freaking A!

Doula Retreat

2007-11-05T21:05:00.000-08:00

I'm feeling refreshed, replenished, and renewed!!! I went to the Utah Doulas Association Fall Retreat this past weekend. What an awesome bunch of ladies to be surrounded by.

I went expecting the usual birth conversations, how best to help a client, ect. but what it was, was unexpected. I have rarely encountered a place outside the temple where you could feel the spirit so strong. The women that came to the retreat were from all different walks of life, religion, families, but yet we totally recognized eachother as sisters on both a spiritual and energetic level. It was an emotional retreat, tears were shed, hurt feelings and incorrect beliefs surfaced and were acknowledged. There were no judgements or criticism, but unconditional love which I know is rarely felt.

We celebrated our callings in life as doula's. What an honor it is to assist women in bringing a new spirit to earth! We talked about how faith and prayer are essential to a doula, no matter her religious beliefs or she had none at all. We talked about the need for doulas to take care of themselves so that they could care for their laboring moms. We learned about the Samaritan goddess Inana, her path to self-discovery, fascinating story. We expressed ourselves through art by molding clay into what we thought women serving women would look like to us. Doula is the greek word for "woman's servant". I molded my clay into a husband and wife embracing eachother, with a doula behind them embracing them, supporting them.

Most important to me was that I found the softening of heart that I asked for in helping me forgive another doula(see the previous post below). Forgiving her was very important to me, it was the only way to move past the hurt. And I have. It truly was a life changing weekend.

Socially awkward or inappropriate, take your pick.

2007-10-31T22:50:00.000-07:00

I'm having a pity party. And I feel like it's okay to post it here because I know noone reads my blog. Plus I really need to get some stuff off my chest, so here goes nothing....

What is wrong with me? All my life I have felt like I don't fit in. I don't know if it's just because my brain is hard wired different or whatever, but as far back as I can remember I have always had this ability to make people uncomfortable or disconnected from me by being socially inappropriate. It's so frustrating to say what you feel is appropriate to you and be totally opposite of what the other person was expecting, thus resulting in them loosing confidence in whatever credibility they thought you had.

Over the last two weeks I've had two experiences that I can't seem to let go of. The first was at Relief Society. Now those who know me(mostly my family) know that I've become accustom to staying silent, smile, nod, act like you get what they're talking about. So I rarely offer any input in classes. I learned when I was a child, because of my social inappropriate answers to keep my mouth shut. Because most often it's not the answer the other person was looking for.

Our Relief Society president was teaching the lesson and posed the question, why is it important for us to take care of our bodies? The lesson was on body image. I felt confident I had an answer that would give more insight into the lesson. So raised my hand and offered my take, the word flowed effortlessly through me and it felt like truth to me. Still does. The expression on her face made my stomache churn and I knew that just then I spewed forth a crap load of social inappropriateness. She then said,"Well, that's depressing. Anyone else have a positive perspective on this question?" I wanted to dig myself a deep hole and just hide in it.

The other experience happened yesterday. As a doula, I'm very passionate about childbirth. So when a potential client seeks me out I meet with them to make sure we have a good connection. Birth is such a sacred experience, it's important that if you are hiring a doula that you have a connection with her. And I always encourage that the mom-to-be interview more than one doula, just to be sure.

So yesterday, I opened up my email and find that another doula in my POD(a doula group) has emailed me the entire email conversation between her and a potential client. I had already been interviewed by this potential client in the previous week. She stated in her emails to my fellow doula that she didn't have a connection with me. That would've been fine if she'd just left it there. But went on to talk about how I freaked her and her husband out and then exaggerate some of the things I said. I'm not sure what I did specifically, but I felt like I had been true to myself. I didn't misrepresent what birthing doulas are about. My fellow doula on the other hand was very unprofessional, in my opinion. She has been the one who has constantly reminded me of being professional when it comes to talking about other doulas to clients. I'm sorry, but what she said and then did is very two-faced. Her words talk about how appalling my behavior was with the client, mostly just trying to save face because she wanted to be hired by this client.

I'm starting to wonder what my mission here on earth is. Was I just meant to be a mom? I feel underneath that I'm more than that, but all I've learned from this earthly experience is that it's never good to be myself.

Happy Halloween!

2007-10-31T18:53:00.000-07:00

What a busy day! We've had fun doing the costume parades and playing with lots of friends. I did made the kid's costumes this year. JA was the Transformer Bumblebee and our three girls were fairy princesses. I'm sooo stinkin' mad that I can't find our camera! I actually made cute costumes!

Happy Halloween everyone! Hope everyone has had a fruitful candy harvest!

JA's turn at the hospital

2007-10-27T16:14:00.000-07:00

So last year my daughter, AL, broke her elbow. It required surgery and an overnight stay. JA and AL have lots in common now. They've been comparing their stories all weekend.

This year is JA's turn. Last Friday at school he and his little friend were being dare-devils as they jumped from the TOP of the slide. JA broke his fall by putting his elbow out in front from him. Yeah, he completely fractured it just above the elbow joint. My eyes about bugged out at the x-ray. I've broken a lot of bones, but none of my fractures looked like that. Wow!

I have to say that the staff up at Primary Children's is the best! They worked quickly to get JA comfortable and were very sweet and kind to me. JA had surgery and three pins placed in his elbow yesterday around 6 p.m. I got the honor of staying overnight with him this time because Josh stayed with AL last time. Those little pull out beds they have in the recovery rooms suck!

Poor little guy! He's been so brave through the whole thing. He did a lot of whimpering, but never cried. We're finally home, I'm tired and JA is totally doped up on Loretab and in a sling until the swelling goes down. We go back to Primary Children's next Friday for a cast, and he's all excited about the colors he gets to pick from. On a funny note, he walks around saying to everyone,"I can't believe I got my first broken bone!"

My day

2007-10-25T19:45:00.000-07:00

I was very unproductive today, atleast that's how I feel because I wasn't inside my home for most of the day. However, I was being productive outside. My day starts at 7:30, I know for some that is like sleeping in, I guess I'm lucky then. Get the kids up, dressed, fed, scriptures read, and out the door. I join the early morning commute to JA's school in Davis Co. By the time I get back home my girls and I have been in the car for one hour, that's one hour too long! AM hates her carseat and she's still not big enough, even though she's 1, to be turned around. What can I say? Josh and I make tiny kids. Right when I get home is when I tend to my daily chores, but today our house in Sandy needed some attention - we're still trying to sell it in this sucky market. So pack the girls up again, screaming commences again, and off we go again. Clean, clean, clean - not that it wasn't already clean but when it sat for a long time it needs some spiffing up before its about be shown. Then it's off to pick JA up from school, I know I have all my kids with me because I can hear every single annoying whine and scream in the backseats, back to Sandy to make an appt, to the gas station, to Farnworth Farms to pick up Josh's favorite un-pasturized apple juice(this stuff is seriously the yummiest apple juice you'll ever drink - how's that for a plug?), to Costco(with all four screaming kids), and then back home. Have I mentioned that I'm a gluten for punishment?

I'm very thankful for loving, patient, understanding hubby. He was already home and he could tell by the look on my face that I had already surpassed today's emotional threshold. He let me go out the dinner by myself! It's was peaceful and quiet and I'm feeling oh so much better.

My mantra for tonight is tomorrow will be better, tomorrow will be better, tomorrow will be better!

California fires

2007-10-23T20:07:00.001-07:00

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21431682/

This event is bringing back a lot of memories. We lived in Los Angeles from 2000-04 in a suburb called Canoga Park. It's close to the I-118 freeway that connects to 1-5 on the East and runs West into Simi Valley. In 2003 there was a pretty big fire that came down into Porter Ranch, another suburb that was North of I-118. There was talk of evacuation because of the fear that the fire would jump the freeway into Chatsworth(on the other side of I-118)and we were just a few streets away. The smoke in the air was thick, even inside our home you couldn't escape the smell. Our pool was full of ash and other weird things falling out of the sky. It took a few weeks to get it completely cleaned out. My parents were totally freaked and called me every half hour for updates. Josh and I packed our valuables, had our 72-hour kits ready and all possible evacuation routes highlighted incase the freeways became to jammed. Fortunately the fire was contained and we never had to face that reality, but the anticipation was scary. My prayers are with those who live in sunny, Southern California.

Slug bug!

2007-10-19T22:24:00.000-07:00

I taught my son a bad game. Oy! I don't remember how it started or who taught it to me, but the gist is you slug someone in the arm whenever you see a Volkswagon Beetle. So yeah, I'm driving him to school in a total hypnotic state when out of nowhere I get hit in the arm whilst hearing,"SLUG BUG *insert car color here*!!!" This happened three times on the way to his school. And he finds these cars in the most random places, not on the freeway while we're driving, but he'll see this particular car in parking lots, or on the other side of the road. I have to admit it, he's good.

Halloween is almost here! Yay!

2007-10-18T17:34:00.001-07:00

More Funny Pictures at pYzam.com

One less plate

2007-10-18T17:15:00.001-07:00

It's official, I've one less thing to do. I gave my Presidential resignation last week to the Utah Friends of Midwives Association. I'm sad. I really wanted to commit my all to this organization, but I can't. I just don't have the energy to give to my husband, children, my doula clients, my home, our finances. It sort of a relief, but I'm just sad. It doesn't mean that I can't contribute, I'll be doing plenty when it comes time to defend women's birthing rights. Hopefully I'm on the right path to getting my priorities straightened out.

Another sad thing, Shabby Princess has yanked their papers from Matie Kay's site. Boo on them! Those were some of the most creative blog layouts I've ever seen. I hope Matie will find a way to create her own, she has good taste. I did find another site that has free layouts. Pay a visit to http://www.pyzam.com/ to see what they have.

Happy Birthday to my baby!

2007-10-13T16:20:00.001-07:00

My baby AM is 1 today!

I'm in deep hypnosis.

Smile! I'm 9 cm's here.

Yes, I have my baby! Total happiness. Look at all that hair!

Yep, another birthday to be celebrated. We have three Libra's in our family.

AM is our fourth and final child. Her birth story starts with her conception. I'll spare you the intimate details of our amazing night. lol! Afterwards Josh and I lay in bed, our bodies were literally vibrating. Something neither of us have ever experienced, it was very unique. He rolled over and said,"I wouldn't be surprised if ended up pregnant after tonight." We weren't really trying, but we weren't preventing it either. I didn't say anything to it, but I just knew that I was pregnant. I knew that this would be a very special pregnancy. It definitely was more spiritual by far.

AM came to me several times during my pregnancy to tell me of her mission here on earth, that she would be a healer. And she loved any kind of energy work I had done on me, it always got her moving. I also looked into a new birthing method called Hypnobabies. It is actual medical hypnosis for childbirth. LOVE IT!!!

Three weeks before AM's "guess date"(a term for those who are familiar with the Hypnobabies language), I was having a lot of birthing waves(another Hypnobabies term). I felt like it could be the day. We started getting the house ready and calling everyone that we had invited to attend the birth. The birthing waves kept coming. We called my amazing midwife, Suzanne. My doulas, Roz and Tisha. And a few other people. Suzanne checked me first thing and I was totally disappointed to find that I was only 3 cm's. The birthing waves were starting to die down. I sent everyone home and tried to nap, conserve my energy. About three hours later they picked up again with more intensity. We called everyone back. Still no progress as far as dialation was concerned. My funny midwife then gave me two options, that she could manually dialated my cervix(OUCH!) or tell everyone to go h0me again and try for more sleep. I decided for the latter option. When I was completely honest with myself, I felt like I had performance anxiety. Like they wanted me to birth my baby more than I wanted to. After four hours of what felt like transition, we sent everyone home and my birthing waves completely stopped at midnight.

For the next three weeks, nothing, nada, zero, zilch. No birthing waves AT ALL. No hints at all that birth was near.

Friday, October 13th was approaching(AM's guess date was Oct 15th). Being the superstitious mom that I am, I kept thinking that I didn't want a baby on Friday the 13th. Talk about the Law of Attraction, AM had decided to pick her own birthday. Sure enough my birthing time began promptly at midnight at the beginning of Friday the 13th.

I remember just getting into bed about 10 minutes prior to everything beginning. One birthing wave began with a lot of intensity. I was trying not to get my hopes up. After about five good birthing waves I began to go deep inside myself and let go. I felt my baby slip underneath my pubic bone with such ease. I was so amazed at how intune I was with my body. 20 minutes later my water broke. AM's head was so low that nothing came out, just a tiny trickle. I let Josh know that it was baby time, that was his cue to call our midwife and this time only our one favorite doula and friend, Tisha.

The time between Josh making the calls and me getting in the tub was a total whirlwind. I was deep in my hypnosis experiencing time distortion. I remember doing some cleaning. I felt in control the entire time. It was painless too, I was just enjoying the sensations and being in awe of what my body was doing.

My midwife, Suzanne, showed up and found me sitting on the toilet. I had a huge urge to have a bowel movement. With a smile on her face she told me to get my butt of the toilet so she could check me. Sure enough I was 8 cm's. I got off our bed and gave Josh a High Five, smiles and hurray's all around. I got into our tub and relaxed in the warm water. My doula showed up and took pictures. One moment I'll never forget is Josh, Tisha, and Suzanne just sitting in front of the tub in complete awe. It was so quiet, I felt like I had to talk or entertain them. Tisha later told me she was just amazed at how calm I was. A little bit before 5 a.m. I started getting huge urges to push. I instructed Josh or Tisha, I can't remember, to put in my "Pushing Baby Out" hypnosis script into the cd player. I pushed my 9lbs 1 oz baby girl into my arms. I was euphoric.

I had my baby in my arms and was just relaxing in the tub waiting to push out the afterbirth. It was so much fun inspecting her. She had a head FULL of hair and was so calm. I spent those precious minutes just gazing into her eyes. She was gorgeous! Once everything was complete, Josh was able to cut the cord once it stopped pulsating. I got out of the tub, walked over to our bed and just held her more. After about 30 minutes my midwife did all the newborn examinations and screening right there on our bed. I participated throught the whole thing and Suzanne was very respectful of AM, no harsh rubbing but gentle hands and soft voices. It was beautiful and peaceful and easy. My midwife left a few hours later, we dressed our new baby(she had no name for the first 2 days of her life, but we eventually found a fitting name for the day she was born on) and snuggled her in bed as we fell asleep.

A few hours later we woke up, got our kids up and introduced them to their new sister. JA was so mad at us, he really wanted to see her birth. I had done a lot of preparation with him for this birth, but in the end it was in the middle of the night, he was asleep and everything was already so peaceful that we didn't see the need to add more to it. So he scolded us and then asked me the next day for a baby brother. ROFLMBO! I told him that mommy needed some time to heal and that IF we had another baby I would definitely let him be at the birth. Um, that's a BIG IF!

AM is such a wonderful baby, we couldn't ask for anything more. I love her personality and how she has already sensed what her mission in life is. She has brought a great deal of healing to our family in so many ways. We love you AM!!!

Fun dinner!

2007-10-12T09:20:00.001-07:00

Last night I got together with an old friend from high school. I haven't seen Scott Pearson for 10 years. Too long! My hubby and I got to meet his awesome wife Melanie and their adorable little boy Matthew(too cute!). We reminisced about the good ol' days at GHS and about life. It was fun and I'm definitely looking forward to our next get-together.

Thanks Scott and Melanie! You two were so much fun.

Josh and I completed our night by finding a vacant parking lot and making out til .......JUST KIDDING! We ended up going to the movies and seeing Seeker: The Dark Is Rising. Please don't waste your money on this movie. Wait til it goes to the $1 movies and then take your little guy, he'll love it. Just enough action for little people, but a story line that makes you think there's more coming and then nothing. Bah!

One year older

2007-10-10T10:42:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to me! I'm the big 2-9! My hubby's birthday present to me is to send me out shopping. I'm so excited! My wardrobe is dying for an overhall - no more frumpy mommy lounge clothes. lol! I'll have to drag along my fashion savvy little sister who knows more about what's "in" than I do. Wish me luck that I'll find some good sales along the way.

Sweet!

2007-10-06T20:19:00.000-07:00

I love my new template! This blog has free templates and they are uber cute!

http://matiekay.blogspot.com/

Happy belated birthday to my little guy!

2007-09-30T13:29:00.000-07:00

My cute son, JA, turned 7-years-old just few days ago. I still get all choked up when I think about how my little guy is growing up. He's been such a fun kid.

Jacob's birth started my journey into the world of birthing education, doulas, and midwifery. Jacob's birthing day started the day before he was born. I was getting so tired of being big and a lot of people told me walking would encourage birthing to start. We had just moved to L.A. and were living in the business apartments paid for by his work(and the best part was the maid that came once a week, heaven!). And kitty-corner from us was a mall. The walk didn't look that long, but being that big OH MY HECK! What was I thinking? But I did it, it was all for a good cause right? I got home and oh my gosh the back ache would not go away. No one told me that a back ache was a symptom of being in labor. I just decided to lay down and sleep as much as I could. Sleep was not easy either because I had PUPPPS(Pruritic urticarial papules and plaques of pregnancy). What a nightmare of a rash, I scratched until I bleeding. Unable to sleep, itching and scratching, I was now getting urges to pee like every five minutes. Still nothing was clicking in my pregnant brain that I was in labor. Around midnight I lost my mucous plug(eww, I know that the last word you want to hear, but it's the truth and since I'm a birth guru you may hear even more detailed words such as placenta and cervix, oh my!). Five minutes later a tiny POP. No gushing or "the flood gates hath opened", but leaking like I couldn't hold my pee in.

I labored at home as long as I thought was neccessary(I should've stayed home A LOT longer) and then we headed to the hospital around 6 a.m. I had no idea what I was in for. They hooked me up to several machines, had a very uncomfortable monitoring belt around my big belly and noone to tell me I had options. I had every right to get out of that hospital bed and walk around, to refuse an IV(even if I was Strep B positive), to refuse being "checked" every hour on the hour, every right to labor in different positions, to do so many other things. But no, the nurses just let me lay flat on my back in that stupid bed. Probably the worst thing for a laboring mother. After being checked so frequently, being rudely interrupted my mother-in-law followed by sister-in-laws who came by to participate by becoming voyeurs, learning our JA was posterior I relented and got the epidural. Yes, it's not as bad as I imagined and it did bring me relief. But I was still left on my back which doesn't help baby progress and decreases oxygen to baby because me laying on a major artery. To make matters worse the epidural STOPPED my labor progressing, which is very common I later learned. No one told me about the epidurals side effects either. That I would shake uncontrollably, that it would stop my labor(adding further more "preventions" to augment labor) and that I would birth a very sleepy, sluggish baby.

They finally started me on PIT(pitocin), which is a total monster. And because my body wasn't ready for it(it never is and don't ever let a nurse or dr tell you that pitocin is natural, it's synthetic and will never be like the real oxytocin the body puts out which is much more gentler and effective) it started stressing JA out in the womb. BABY'S DON'T LIKE PITOCIN! It's not good for them, and I'll never understand why impatient women would choose to augment labor like that(except in cases where it is medically neccessary, which I have witnessed), it's torture for mom and baby. So JA is getting stressed out, still no one is letting me move onto my side and then the dr's start coming in and threatening C-section. Finally I'm complete and pushing lasts for 45 minutes, and it was "purple pushing" where the nurse yells in your ear," 10, 9, 8, 7, 6,....!!!" So your holding your breath and depriving yourself and baby from more oxygen, meanwhile your face starts to turn red and it looks like you may pop a vein in your forehead. From start to finish, his birth was 18 hours(from the time we entered the hospital to the time he was birthed). I tore. Had I been in an optimal pushing position I wouldn't have. Most women won't tear if they're in a good position, and episiotomies should only become neccessary in the event that the woman is going to tear upward toward her clitoris. The lithotomy position(on your back with legs in the air, in a stirrup, or up behind your ears), is the WORST position to push in.

And because JA had a tinge of meconium(when baby takes a dump in utero right before birth, it can be bad, but his fluid was barely yellow) in the amniotic fluid they wouldn't let me hold him right away. I cried while the dr stitched me up, I didn't even get the chance to see him. The dr wanted to know what I was "boobin" about. I think I was crying because I was already in mourning. Mourning all the happy moments in birth that should've happened, mourning my lack of participation because I felt like an observer, mourning how my body had been treated. Nothing about what I had gone through was sacred. Then in an exasperated-give-her-what-she-wants voice he asks the pediatric nurses to hurry and bundle JA up so I could hold him.

FINALLY, in my arms! I'm in love! He is the most beautiful baby boy I've ever seen! My joy lasted 20 minutes because then the nurses insisted on taking him back to the nursery to get under a warmer so he could maintain his body temperature. Had I known I would've slapped him next to me, skin-to-skin and started nursing. I had just been through a workout, I was plenty warm for the both us. Sheesh, isn't that a survival tip they teach you in Boyscouts? Plus I needed that bonding time that was so rudely stolen from both of us as soon as he was born. But no, they whisked him away to the nursery for 6 HOURS! I was furious. In that time, they bathed him, took off all that good vernix that keeps baby's skin moisturized(without it baby's skin cracks and dries up and baby lotion just doesnt' cut it), gave him a bottle, do you think he wanted to breastfeed? NOPE!!! Not to mention that when I did get him the rude nurse wouldn't give me a moment to just snuggle with my newborn, no she wanted us to breastfeed and her idea of helping the process along was grabbing my breast and shoving it into a sleepy baby's mouth. Neither of us were very happy. I was greatful when she left, I was greatful to snuggle my baby skin-to-skin, it felt natural, it felt right.

The next morning HOLY SORENESS BATMAN! Shaking from the epidural had left me sore all over, I literally couldn't move. The epidural site hurt so much. The hospital food was horrible. Josh had taken the day to spend with his mom and sisters, leaving me all alone with my fluxuating hormones and a newborn. Thanks! Reality really hit me when JA had his first bowel movement of meconium. The nurses wouldn't let him room-in with me, so they would bring him back and forth from my room to the nursery. Well, he had this messy diaper and I kept wondering why they kept bringing him back to me with a messy diaper? It. Hit. Me. I'm the mom and I have to change the diaper. Whoa! Yeah, it's funny now.

I left the hospital the next day thinking that IF I had another baby there had to be another way, a better way. And there was! Lo and behold I was knocked up again six months later and I'll share AL's birth story on her December birthday. Maybe now you can see why I'm so passionate about childbirth and why I wanted to be a birthing doula.

But now I have this truly beautiful boy of 7. He is a joy to me. JA I feel so blessed that you came to our family, you have brought us so much happiness and have taught us so much. You helped me find my passion. I love your spirit and zest for life. I love how you love rocks, insects, and are sooo interested in the human body. I love how mechanical you are with your hands and how you want find out how everything works by taking it apart and putting it back together. I love how your kiss me and your sisters goodbye when you leave for school. I love your sensitivity and your intuitiveness. I feel so blessed to have this Crystal child. Thankyou for coming to me.

I'll post some pictures later of his birthday party(because I'm quite proud of them). We did a homemade "Transformers" birthday party, since that is JA's super hero of choice these days. I downloaded Optimus Prime wallpaper, cropped it and added wording with our Printshop and printed them out on photo paper. Bought a record-shaped pinata, took if it's decor and cover it with black and silver(foil) to make a Decepticon face. I found some Transformers plates and cups at the party store, Transformers colored ballons(blue & red for Optimus Prime, black and yellow for Bumblebee), four pizza's from Little Ceasars and Kool-aid that we already had. I used brown paper lunch sacks, that I already had, for the goody bags and glued Autobot and Decepticon faces on them. I made a birthday cupcake tower for his birthday cake. I think I spent about $50 for this birthday party.

Best part, JA and his friends had a blast! It was fun to visit with the parents from his school class. This birthday party was a success!

Get To Know Me

2007-09-26T22:49:00.000-07:00

I stole this little questionnaire from a friends MySpace page. Thought it would be fun to post. Enjoy!

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Katie
Birthday: October 10th
Birthplace: Coos Bay, Oregon
Current Location: Murray, UT
Eye Color: gray/grey - however you want to spell it
Hair Color: brunette
Height: 5'1"
Right Handed or Left Handed: I'm a lefty
Your Heritage: European(scottish, english, french, and german)
The Shoes You Wore Today: Running shoes
Your Weakness: Men with accents, Scottish accents makes me melt.
Your Fears: tripping right before the finish line - in so many ways
Your Perfect Pizza: Ham and pineapple
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: survive Christmas with the in-laws
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: okay. I write "okay" a lot. Guess I'm just agreeable.
Thoughts First Waking Up: I'll get up in 10 more minutes
Your Best Physical Feature: my ankles lol!
Your Bedtime: Usually midnight, I'm a total night owl
Your Most Missed Memory: Vacation with my hubby right before he went on his mission, that was the funnest vacation of my life!
Pepsi or Coke: Coke, but if it's Pepsi it has to have vanilla in it.
MacDonalds or Burger King: Neither. I can't do fast food anymore, I really like my gallbladder and want to keep it in me.
Single or Group Dates: Depends on the group.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: I rarely drink this stuff anymore, and I can't even remember which one I had. I remember drinking one with a peach flavor, soooo good!
Chocolate or Vanilla: Both
Cappuccino or Coffee: I like the smell of them, but I don't drink either.
Do you Smoke: no
Do you Swear: in my head, does that count?
Do you Sing: all the time.
Do you Shower Daily: no, I prefer every other day.
Have you Been in Love: I too, thought I knew what it was to be in love. I was sadly mistaken.
Do you want to go to College: Will be going to back to the Utah College of Midwifery next year.
Do you belive in yourself: some days yes, some days no
Do you get Motion Sickness: no
Do you think you are Attractive: I used think I was attractive, but not anymore. I miss that the most about me.
Are you a Health Freak: Yes, it the only way I'm keeping all my body parts inside me.
Do you get along with your Parents: I have boundaries with them.
Do you like Thunderstorms: Who doesn't like a thunderstorm?
Do you play an Instrument: no. I used the play the clarinet in 5th and 6th grade.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: uh, no
In the past month have you Smoked: nope
In the past month have you been on Drugs: define drugs. oh the illegal kind? uh no.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: I cannot tell how much I want to go shopping now. It's one of those times when you really hate living within a budget. Gah! (I'm totally swearing in my head right now.)
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Yes, but I'm still a health nut.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Ewww!
In the past month have you been on Stage: No
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: This is my life long dream. I have yet to do this and I swear before I die that I will go skinny dipping atleast once!
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: uh, one gummy worm for the bulk bin, shhhh...
Ever been Drunk: no, but I think muscle relaxers can induce the effect on me....I guess.
Ever been called a Tease: yes. I admit I was a tease back in high school. I think I hurt some feelings over it too.
Ever been Beaten up: I've been threatened.
Ever Shoplifted: well, I stole a gummy worm, so I guess a I have.
How do you want to Die: I don't want to die, I'd rather be twinkled.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: A grown up.
What country would you most like to Visit: Scotland.
Number of Drugs I have taken: 0
Number of Piercings: 2, one in each ear.
Number of Tattoos: 0
Number of things in my Past I Regret: A lot!

Marriage break through

2007-09-25T13:32:00.000-07:00

Is break through one word or two? Can't remember.

Anyhoo! I feel like we've been making some progress in our marriage and I'm starting to feel better. We've been going to a counselor for some weeks now and up until our last meeting everything was just so-so. We really started to take a deeper look into why we chose to marry eachother. The qualities and common goals that lead us to choose eachother. I've been so busy feeling inadequate, unworthy, and small in this marriage that it was sort of struggle for me to find the good qualities about me. But I've found some.

The quality that I admire in my husband is that he is a great example to me. He's always been the teacher in our marriage. And our marriage has been on big learning adventure for me and I don't think it'll ever stop being that way. I'm okay with that. But maybe you can see why I've felt like I brought nothing to the marriage. It's kind of hard when you feel like you have to be the teacher and your student isn't benefitting from anything your teaching. Then you start thinking that you're the dud in the relationship.

So I've started to think of us in a different way. Our relationship dynamic is that he's the teacher, I'm the student. Wow! I know this may seem simple to other couples, but this is huge for me. I have now only to be greatful for the man that I married. He has taught many think that I don't think I would've otherwise learned in another relationship. This leaves me in a wonderful, unique position. I have been in pursuit of things that I can do to show my hubby how much I love him, but I can't reciprocate with the kind of gifts that he gives me. Roses and chocolate spontaneously brought home totally earn brownie points! However, my man's not a roses and chocolate kind of guy. So what do teachers love from their students? When they do their homework? Duh! It hit me that I can quit all the inner murmuring and focus on all these wonderful things he's taught me and start applying them. Wow, that's a change of heart in a way. Maybe now things will feel more real from me for him. Feeling a lot better today.

My 2-year-old

2007-09-22T23:34:00.000-07:00

MC is my 2-year-old. She is so full of life and I love it. She does the cutest things, like when she wakes up in the morning she happily announces to her tired mother, "I waked up!". She wants so much for us to be proud of her little accomplishments.

Well, yesterday she must of thought she conquered a huge feat of washing her hair. I was upstairs folding some laundry when I noticed that it was really quiet downstairs. Now all moms know that silence is never good. I walked downstairs to the sound of the toilet flushing, keep in mind that we're potty training said 2-year-old who has acquired a new fascination with the toilet because of it. All I can think is, "great what's she flushed now?!" and that cartoon of baby Daffy Duck when he's learning to flush the potty,"water go down the hole" - flush. I walk over to the bathroom to find MC with her head in the toilet and just flushing away giving herself swirlies. Bahahahaaa!!! How can you be mad at that? It totally made my day.

My Weekend

2007-09-15T22:06:00.000-07:00

So, the other day, Josh woke me up at 5 a.m. He had been awake since 2:30 and not sleeping well. He wakes me up saying,"Um, I think I'm going to take my dad's offer and go to Oregon for the weekend." Okay, I'm awake and you have my full attention. Run that by me one more time!

Things have been extremely stressful for him at work lately. And while where he works is a great environment, he's decided that he's just not passionate about his career. It's starting to affect him physically. The problems in our marriage are a small part of this too. So he wanted to take a weekend to decide what the next step for him will be. New career? Keep working? New job? What?

I am really hoping that he's finding the answers he's looking for. It's kind of scary when your future feels so uncertain. I am happy to report that since he took the weekend off that he's been getting more sleep and feeling more restful. That makes me feel better since he's not been sleeping well at all that last month.

With that said he decided to take JA along for company. And now it's just me and the girls. AL and I have spent the last two nights playing "makeup". Giving eachother manicures, pedicures, painting nails, putting on makeup, getting all glamoured up. I wish Josh hadn't taken the camera because at the end of the night we both look like clowns. Atleast I feel like a clown, AL however, feels beautiful. And that's what is important.

This has given me the opportunity to tune into my daughters and just get to know them better. I think they'd agree with me, that we're all having a great weekend.

Having said that, I hate, absolutely hate sleeping alone! Why is it so hard to fall asleep or even want to get into bed when your bestfriend isn't there next you?

I've also had time to think about our marriage. We've been in this really long rut now. But I'm glad to be with someone who's not a quitter. I'm giving up either. He really is my bestfriend. I enjoy all the playful moments we have together and want more of those memories. I know sometimes the grass looks greener on the other side, but when I really think about life without him, I know it wouldn't be as good as this. I really am so blessed to be with a man that loves me and wants to create a better partnership. I really do have a lot to be greatful for.

Happy Birthday 9/11

2007-09-11T15:30:00.000-07:00

This blog goes out to my nephew who celebrates his birthday today. I remember how I was in complete udder shock on 9/11. My heart grieved for those who lost their lives and those who were left behind, but my heart also grieved for my nephew. My nephew has had a difficult life and 9/11 just kind of added insult to injury. It was difficult for him to accept that his special day would be remembered as a day of chaos, disaster, mourning, grieving, and helplessness.

Happy Birthday bud! I know you may not like me saying this, but I hope we never forget 9/11 and how it touched us individually.

Open Mouth, Insert Foot

2007-09-10T21:43:00.001-07:00

I've finally done it! I've had my most embarrassing moment since high school. More embarrassing than the time my daughter, AL, blamed me for publicly farting(when it was someone else, honest!), and probably my most embarrassing moment EVER.

Tonight was Family Home Evening and as a treat for our kiddies we decided to take them to the dollar store. We were having a good time, JA picked out a fake handcuff set, AL wanted a coloring book, I got some Jolly Ranchers(yum!), and our babies were feverishly trying to pull everything they could off the shelves. Josh spent most of the time chasing after MC(have legs, will run......away) and preventing AL from pulling the cart over with AM in it. What a night!

And it just got worse. As I was walking with Josh past some isle I notice a husband and wife who are embracing eachother. And it isn't just any embrace, it was the kind that made me think that maybe this woman is pregant and laboring kind of embrace. Her arms were clasped around his neck, his arms were supporting her upper back like he was holding her up. In doula speak we call this movement "dancing". They were swaying as well. I noticed the woman's body. She was definitely full figured and I thought her pregnant belly added to that fullness. I looked at their basket and noticed that it was full. I thought to myself, "hmmm, she must be nesting or in early phase." Early phase refers to the time when the cervix dialates from 0-4 cms. This time can take anywhere from hours to minutes. If it's first time mom, usually takes hours.

Now as a birthing doula I get all excited when I see a pregnant woman. I get anxious to share with her all the wonderful things a doula can do for a laboring woman. Can ya already see where I'm headed with this? So I confidently walk up to her and say,"I'm sorry, but I couldn't help noticing you and your husband doing the birthing dance, are you by chance in labor?" I was seriously ready to show them all my neat techniques right there in the store. Instead, she looked at me confused(probably thinking what the bleep is a birthing dance?) and replied,"Oh, no, I'm not in labor. I'm not pregnant. What you saw was just me giving my husband a hug."

Someplace, somewhere is a deep hole with my name on it that I can hide in. I must've turned several shades of red as I profusely apologized. I feel very lucky that she was nice about it and that this couple was already at the cash register checking out when I pounced on them. When I hear these kind of stories, usually the offended woman has a quick tongue and lashes out. Anyway, I quickly walked to the back of the store and told Josh about my moment. He had a good laugh. I hope you readers are too.

BTW, I have reached the clean up pinnacle for ALL poop messes(I've done the whole Poocasso thing too). I don't think anything can ever top this. My son, JA, has a habit that we're trying to break of using too much toilet paper when he does a #2. And then of course he doesn't flush because he knows it will flood. Well, it sat over night, completely unknown to us. Until this morning when my two-year-old MC flushed the potty. Poop and toilet paper over flowed out of the toilet, onto the floor, down onto the floor by our waterheater, out into the kitchen and it somehow reached outside. GROSS!!!! So yeah, I got the clean up the poop mess of all poop messes. I don't think it can get any worse than this. "Bring It On!", is all I've got to say to my two youngest. As a consequence for causing the toilet to flood(because he should've come and got us to tell us that the toilet was too full, because he's a repeat offender in flooding our toilets, this is nothing new), he got to clean my kitchen floor. Sweet! I didn't want to mop anyway.

Marriage

2007-09-07T13:41:00.000-07:00

As if my blog wasn't already a downer, I think I'll add another log on the fire. I feel the need to blog about my marriage today. Maybe someone can sympathize with me, but have you ever woken up on morning and wondered what happened to me? And how did I get here? I can't deny it anymore, but I feel very unfulfilled in my marriage - in every area.

Now before I start making sound like my husband sound like not a nice guy, let me say he is. He is an excellent catch. He a great listener, a great provider, an awesome father - he absolutely loves his children, the most logical and objectional thinker I know(which is a huge help to me because most times I'm the irrational, impulsive one), not a quitter, always full of solutions, and is totally cute-to-boot!

No the problem doesn't lie with him, but me. I guess I had this expectation that when I eventually married that I would be my husband's muse, his inspiration, and that I could help his reach his full potential, help him feel his self-worth as much as he helps me feel my divine nature. Well, it didn't turn out that way. How do you inspired, encourage, enlighten someone who already does that for you? I entered into our marriage feeling very inadequate, feeling not needed. How had I attracted someone so wonderful, so giving, so loving, so self-sufficient? I immediately felt really low, just feeling like I would never match him. And immediately I felt even worse because I remember a quote by one our General Authorities, I don't remember who said it, but it went along the lines of," the General Authorities are in the positions they are today because of the women they married". Then to make matters worse my husband said one day after a Fast & Testimony meeting, after me commenting on how wonderful it was that a lot of husbands were getting up and praising their wives, that the wives must be deserving of such praise, in other words they did the work to get the prize.

Well, that did it for me. I was doomed to be unhappy in this marriage. I already felt inadequate, felt unworthy of praise, and it made me hurt even more because here is this wonderful man, this spiritual giant who should be doing great things and I can't inspire him. On top of it he's been sick our entire marriage with various ailments(one for which he had surgery for). And now my body is starting to manifest my unhappiness(my thyroid, adrenals, and gallbladder are not functioning right anymore). When do you say enough is enough?

I guess I'm at a crossroads in my marriage right now. I miss me, how I used to be before we were dating. So full of energy and life, just starting to figure out my place and be comfortable with who I was. But the consequences of leaving an 8-year marriage with four children has profound effects. At times I can't even rationalize my reasons. This would be devastating to our small children and I've seen what the effects of divorce have on children. However, my kids need a fully functional mom. How do I find happiness for them when I feel hopeless?

Rainbows

2007-09-03T11:32:00.000-07:00

We got this picture on the way home, just coming into Park City. I couldn't get it all on camera, but it actually was two double FULL rainbows. Something you don't see very often.

I had a great weekend. Some friends of our invited our little family up to spend the weekend at their cabin. It was an absolute blast! The boys went 4-wheelin' and us girls stayed behind, doing what girls do best - talking. I spent a majority of the time playing Risk with my hubby. Wow, I never knew that game could be played that long. And the kids loved being out in nature. It was nice to have a good weekend for a change.

Embracing my To Do list

2007-08-30T21:45:00.000-07:00

I'm just wondering if maybe I acknowledge and embrace my "to do" list, maybe it will actually get done.

Tomorrow I need to:

- Call my POD(a doula term) and arrange childcare for the upcoming births that I will be attending.
- Call another doula who I will be apprenticing with next month.
- Email another potential client.
- Get the kids ready to go spend time at the cabin with friends.
- Put all our food away in our pantry that is finally finished.
- Chores, bleh!
- Arrange a post-partem visit for another client.
- Drop off and pick up my kiddies from school.
- Somehow get my other two kiddies to take naps inbetween all of the aforementioned to-do's
- Manage to feed myself(which hasn't been easy task lately) and do this all with a smile on my face. Yeah, right!

We'll see how tomorrow goes.

Weird dreams

2007-08-28T09:25:00.000-07:00

Last night hit me with a doozy of two odd dreams. The kind that make you wonder why? Why did I dream about this person? And what do I need to learn from it? First, I am a firm believer that dreaming is either a way of your subconscious working out a problem, something needing to manifest itself(because everything is symbolic in one way or the other), or a way of receiving answers to some of life's difficult questions. And second, I think last nights dreams had to do with my high school reunion because quite of few people from my past were in it.

It's funny, when I dream I think I get a glimpse of the true me. The person inside that I know is just witty, daring, spontaneous, and fun. The scene for both dreams happened on the campus of where I went to college. I thought it was interesting that while I saw college alumni's, I saw some high school alumni's that I know didn't go there. I was schmoozing with my old college cheer squad, we decided to crash a fraternity party. I stole something important, it was like a mascot of some sort. I was caught sneeking out and started running back towards my dorm. The guys were in pursuit. (I have this odd delight in being chased in dreams, it makes me feel like I'm back in elementary playing tag.....ah, that was fun!) I was eventually caught just as I got to my dorm room, the mascot taken back, and I was thrown over the shoulder of the one my high school mates(I know who it was, but no names mentioned here). The only thing I can remember saying as I was over the shoulder facing this guy's backside/rearend was something like,"Oh ______, is this the real you? You must introduce me!", followed by him hitting me hard on my backside. But then my bladder woke me up. Darn bladder! Just when things were getting interesting!

The second dream took place in my dorm room. I had retired for the night and had been asleep(in my dream) for some time when I started to feel something caress my face. It was nice. Whoever it was started kissing my cheek(yeah, I know, gross makeout dream. But really? Who doesn't love a good makeout dream? It's just taboo to write about it.) and traveled to my lips. Something was wrong, it didn't feel like my husband's kiss. I woke up from my sleep to find my ex-fiance' sitting next to me(yes, I was engaged to another man before marrying Josh. Good guy, just different views about what a marriage was supposed to be). Totally creeped out! I can't remember what was said, but I felt his intent was to rape me. He was angry at me for ending the relationship and wanted what he thought was his. I was able to push him away from me and run away again(not fun this time). Thank heaven my alarm went off. I was having a difficult time waking up from that one.

So now I'm off to locate my dream dictionary. My brain is too tired to figure these two out.

Can't believe it's been 10 years

2007-08-26T20:14:00.000-07:00

Way back then.

How I look today. My sweet husband, Josh, sitting with me at my reunion.

Last Saturday I participated in Granger High's 10-year reunion. I participated in planning it too(a whole lot more than I thought I was going to do). It was an absolute blast! But as I was reflecting back on my senior year I felt really sad. I have so many regrets, that if I was given one wish in my whole life I'd go back to my senior year and do a whole lot of things very differently.

Things I would do different:

1) NO boyfriends. No one wants to date you when you're tied-down.

2) Play the field! There were so many guys that I had super huge crushes on. If I had the confidence that I do now I'd totally ask them out on a date.

3) Still do Drill Team. I hated the politics, but man I loved dancing!

4) Concentrate more on my academics. Seriously I would.

5) Stop being so anti-social. There were so many things that I missed out on(that I've now learned) because I spent too much time being angry at things that were out of my control.

6) Get a real job - grow up. I coached gymnastics all through out high school. It was a fun job, but considering anything other than coaching was below me. Yeah, I was a gymnastics snob. It would've been nice to get more experience outside of what I knew.

7) Have fun just being a teenager. I remember I couldn't wait to become an adult and now I really long for the days when it was only me and I could sleep in.

8) Stop being afraid of confrontations.

9) Take different classes.

10) Be a better sister and friend.

So the questions of the day are - if given one wish to go back in time, would you do it? And if so, where would you go and what 10 things would you do different?

Why finding a babysitter is a major pain!

2007-08-24T10:12:00.000-07:00

I hate having to find a babysitter if ever I ever want to do something. I remember when I was young how I hated being asked to babysit. This feeling mostly comes from my mom's daycare. My mom has had an in-home daycare as long as I can remember. I was always resentful towards those children because when my mom had something to do(much like I have something to do today) she put my sisters and I in charge. Or guilted us into watching the kids by saying something like,"this is how I pay for you guys to do................." And often their needs came before ours. So no, I will never have a daycare just to pay for my kids extracurricular activities. I really do love my mom. She did the best she could for us considering her circumstances, but I'm doing things differently with my little family.

So I totally understand where the rejection comes from when a teen says, "no" or makes up some weird excuse. Nevertheless, I still need babysitters. I still need them so I can date my husband, so he won't feel low on my priority list. So today I can give my son's new teacher the attention she needs so that my son will be successful in school. So that I can get things done, like when I have to go into the bank or post office for a transaction that requires face-to-face interaction. Don't get me wrong, I love taking my kiddies all over with me, but sometimes it's nice when it's just me.

Conformity

2007-08-22T21:44:00.000-07:00

I think I must be the poster child for conformity. I admit it, I mostly follow the crowd when it comes to the "in" things. Especially after reading so many of my fellow alumni's blogs, it just looks like a lot of fun and a great way to get to know them again. And blogs must be "in". So here I am, joining legions in posting about my messed up life to boot!

I chose "Too Many Plates" because that's just where I am in life right now.
Too much on my plate. Right now my plates are:
- My relationship with my Heavenly Father(it needs some serious help right now).
- My husband (and I won't lie, it's not been a picnic here either)
- My 4 children (I'm a huge liar when I say I love motherhood, truth is it's a daily struggle and I'm saddened that I feel this way most days)
- My doula business (I'm very passionate about childbirth and will dedicate a blog to that later, but it's active actual business that many people consider a hobby....grrrr!)
- I'm the President of the Utah Friends of Midwives Association (no, I don't get paid for it but it great opportunity to help me get out of my comfort zone and talk with intimidating people)
- I've been homeschooling my oldest son who is a High Functioning Autistic (that's another blog)
- We just moved. Hate moving with a passion! And we're still cleaning up our other home.
- I just finished being on my 10-year reunion committee and will help in planning our 15-year reunion.(man, I have so many regrets from high school, but the reunion was an absolute blast!)

I have lots of other "plates" and because this is a public place these are only "plates" I feel comfortable sharing.

A little bit about my family. Josh and I have been married for 8 years. We have four kids: JA, AL, MC, and AM. Again, this is a public place and my kids are very special to me, so we'll only being using their initials. J was just diagnosed with High Functioning Autism and we've been working very diligently with him to get him where he is today. He used to fit more directly into the Autism Spectrum with more significant autistic symptoms. But JA is a total boy all over. He loves super heroes, Transformers, insects, rocks and especially nature. AL is our princess. She loves My Little Ponies, CareBears, and play makeup- what little girl doesn't? MC is our mischievious little dare-devil girl. She loves to be read to and loves to scare the wits out of me with her death defying stunts. AM is our baby. She's definitely the most high-maintenance out of all our kids. I need a lot of energy to work with her because she mostly likes to stay attached to me at all times of the day. It's exhausting.

So that me and my little family in a nut shell. I'm sure I'll much more to add to this place.

The Cameron Family

Going crazy on Facebook

First singles activity, first crush

May 2008

Yes, I AM ALIVE!!!

Still here

My college roomies

Hypnomom of the month

*insert sad/witty title here*

Lia Sophia party - pretty jewelry!

Please be patient

Busy!

Kidney needed

Changed my mind

Betcha didn't see this coming!

Ta da!!!

Under construction!

Experimenting

I can't stop myself!

Tagged!

Adventures of an inventory auditor - embarrassing moment, sort of

Midwifery Legislation update

My fun sleepover

Snowy roads = poo!

Discovery Gateway

Valentine's Day crafts

GNO

Health Committee heard our case today

Check out the Reunion Blog!

Come show your support(and read below as well).

Utah's midwives NEED your help!

Tagged!

Happy Day

President Hinckley 1910-2008

My baby is sick

Memories

Girls Night Out

I'm hiding in my bedroom...

Spammers

Seriously.

What does it mean to be a child of God?

Strummin' on the ol' banjo!

Shameless plug

Foosball

Merry Christmas!!!

Chocolate and oreos...

Happy Birthday Alisha!

Happy Birthday Josh!!!

My Crystal children - feeling blessed to be a mom

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!!!

I wish mom's could collect sick days

It's finally off!

Awesome birth!

The little joys

Yucky kid food

Christmas music already?

Doula Retreat

Socially awkward or inappropriate, take your pick.

Happy Halloween!

JA's turn at the hospital

My day

California fires

Slug bug!

Halloween is almost here! Yay!

One less plate

Happy Birthday to my baby!

Fun dinner!

One year older

Sweet!

Happy belated birthday to my little guy!

Get To Know Me

Marriage break through

My 2-year-old

My Weekend

Happy Birthday 9/11

Open Mouth, Insert Foot

Marriage

Rainbows

Embracing my To Do list

Weird dreams

insert sad/witty title here